Musings on turning 60 -a womans perspective
Well I have just turned 60 and my body maintenance bill has gone up by $60 per week.
Hair dye, glasses, dentures, hearing aids..”what???” push up bras and tummy flatteners!
I looked in the mirror the other day and my hair was so grey over my ears that I could have been mistaken for the Koala on our national emblem! I really couldn’t say anything about that because I had mistakenly glued my dentures in, upside down!!
Then I put on my Push Up Bra. it certainly pushed them up but then they just spilled out under my arms!
So, I tried my Tummy flattener pants on but ended up with no backside and my cantilevered tummy overhang just got squished up to my waist! So that’s what they mean when they say muffin top!
I’ve also got flat arches now and I don’t mean on the patio! And you know you just can’t wear the same colours anymore when you get older. I can’t wear bright Red anymore, looks like mutton dressed up as lamb, oh yeah, we are a multicultural nation now, so I guess it’s mutton dressed up as souvlaki! That Red dress used to look so good on me and I called it my Special K dress. But now it looks more like puffed wheat! I guess I will have to wear black from now on, all the way to my coffin.
Kazablanca from Foster
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